5 Tips For Surviving A Hanson Tour Presale

Once the initial thrill of the up and coming Hanson tour dissipated, I was left with one thought: this presale is going to be the death of me. Not that anyone cares what my opinion of a Hanson presales is, but I’m going to tell you anyways: I loathe them.

Here’s why: If you’re a Hanson fan, then you already know how hard it is to get good seats/spots at their shows. And to be honest nothing blows more than going to a Hanson concert and being stuck in the nosebleed section, holding a pair of binoculars, the whole show. So if you’re not on it like ducks on a june bug, you get screwed royally. Why do we succumb ourselves to the presale? Because you’d have to have no soul or live overseas to miss a Hanson tour!


So here are my 5 tips for surviving what I have now dubbed
Per-salemageddon and how to make the whole process less painful:

Plugs, Plugs and More Plugs-

With only a certain amount of tickets in certain sections (and sometimes it's never the best seats if it’s a seated show) being released and because I have experienced this more than once over the years, get every device with internet access you own fully charged waiting on stand-by incase your Wifi is slow from everyone and their cat’s spirit guide trying to buy tickets online, at the same time.
What also helps is plugging your laptop (if that’s what you’re using) directly into the router, it adds speed to the internet connection which is really nice to have while trying to refresh a page a 1000 other people are trying to refresh at the same time. In addition, this also acts as a safety net from stopping yourself from throwing the computer against a wall when you see half the tickets are already gone by the time you’ve figured out how to navigating around the venue sites.

The Wardrobe-

Things get crazy during a Hanson pre sale; if you’re stuck at work think dressy leggings with flats hair in a neat ponytail. Those of us who are going to be home that morning select the large cup on your Keurig (If you’re a coffee drinker) but go for the spill proof tumbler, trust me on this one.
Ladies not the time to wear stilettos, this is not the time to be sexy. Socks, slippers, bare feet, PJ’s, yoga pants, shorts etc. Is the attire most of us at home will be rocking during the Hanson ticket pre sale . And don’t forget pillows and or a comfy chair, your lower back will thank you for the extra support while you’re bent over your keyboards buying tickets.

Pain relievers-

You think I’m kidding, staring at your computer screen then texting your friends, pacing, rinse and repeat can give you a headache / arms cramps and hand cramps. Better to have them near than lying in a dark room with an ice pack over your eyes later.

 You’re Gonna Need To Eat-

If you do not/barely eat, you will start to feel dizzy about halfway through the presale and could pass out. Passing out in the middle of Hanson presale is such a shitty way to go down!!! Go for foods that will boost your mental state and metabolism that morning. Stay hydrated, stay caffeinated, stay focused!!

A Smile - 

The entire process messes with everyone sanity, still Hanson is hitting the road and that’s something to smile about.


Verdict: 
Dear Hanson,
Sometimes you make us mad, but you occasionally redeem yourselves with goodness. Now go practice one of my fall tour cover requests  “Living on a Prayer”
Thanks Love,
 Suze

Middle of Nowhere Manifesto

You might need to sit down for this part: I didn’t own a copy of Middle of Nowhere till I was an adult. Look, I was busy in the 90’s spending an embarrassing about of time coming up with my own choreography to Paula Abdul songs. I know I’m not alone. Yet I somehow feel grateful for this record, in a time full of sound-a-like teen queens, Middle of Nowhere became something bigger to be part of, while bringing back bubblegum pop music in its purest form. It’s not exactly a deep record, but what did you expect from teen marketed pop music? 

For most Hanson music fans Middle Of Nowhere was the first album they bought. First concert. Mmmbop was the song you counted on to change your teenage headspace that now, as an adult is your patented karaoke got-to. 

Yet during the wait for a new Hanson record there is an internal struggle that seems to fester among fans with what kind of Hanson we really want. We aren’t the same music fans we once were and they aren’t the same band they once were. We want them to have mass appeal but don’t want them to sacrifice the artistically valid music we love either. We like the less commercial Hanson who caters to us and pretend that the idea of Hanson breaking record sales and selling out stadiums again doesn’t make our palms sweat. 

We defend our loyalty to Hanson by telling our friends, co-workers and the folks we go bowling with every Tuesday night “You just don’t get it” when they diss us asking when we are going to grow out of this Hanson thing or why Hanson? Listen up fellow Hanson fans, this is the single most important thing I will ever write in the pages of this blog (besides Underneath Taylor had the best hair) it’s not about “getting it” it’s about the experience. Music is personal like food, sex and the other great joys in life. Middle Of Nowhere is about the unique experience it created for those who really listened, not about getting it. Experience is why some of us find ourselves in tears in the middle of Target when some stupid song comes on. BTW totally normal. 

The non believers never scratch the surface, but we their fans, know to experience Hanson brings you right to the edge and justifies sitting on sidewalks with a number written in marker on your hand as a adult, who has a real job, for twelve hours. BTW totally not normal.   

There is an arguably important factor Hanson fans seem to still over look a decade later after Middle of Nowhere was released: if we stay, they’ll stay. Deep down, that’s all we really want.  

The W’s of MON:

-We will hold on to the ones who really care in the end they’ll be the only ones there
-We've got to change our point of view, if we want the sky blue
-We all get a little bit weird sometimes
-We all need somebody we can turn to someone who'll always understand
-We belong you know it in your heart
Verdict: As the music world continues to evolve, my hope is that we, the Hanson music enthusiasts, have the audacity to stay on their heels through the journey. Also, writing, “I love Taylor” on your face with a sharpie isn’t as cute on an adult like it was on a teenage girl standing in Time Square holding a puffy painted homemade sign. Lastly, the “where’s Johnny?” jokes weren’t funny in 1997 either. It needed to be said.

Pre Tour Freak Out:

A Hanson tour is coming, which always gets complicated. Why so complicated?

  

• I have to get tickets
• Two words: Pre Sale
• You never know if the pre sale links will work for the first hour
• The great ga show vs. seated debate
• What if I spend all of my money and sanity getting tickets and actually succeed?
•  I’m still in school  
• Ever done homework in a hotel room before or after a Hanson show? Terrible on the GPA.
• What if I flunk out of school because of Hanson? Am I willing? Maybe
• How do I explain to work why I need all these days off? Again
• I’m running out of relatives to use as the excuse on the request time off form.
• What am I going to wear?
• No, no and a big fat NO! I don’t need outfits to wear during the walks to.
• Priceline bidding gives me heartburn.
• How many shows can I get away with seeing in a row before my family notices I’m gone?

 If I didn't love Hanson so much, I would hate Hanson. Never the less , even with the aggravation, I know I'm going to go.

So to us, the hopelessly devoted...Here’s to our empty bank accounts, sleepless nights, hours waiting in airport terminals, lost luggage, long car rides and those early mornings spent sitting on sidewalks. The struggle is real......

Verdict: Seeing Hanson doesn't really suppress the craving to see them, and Hanson, in spite of everything, is worth it.

Hop Jam Ramble

As someone who isn’t a huge craft beer fan, I was eager to taste the different beers in hopes that I had just passed judgment too early on and maybe I would find one I liked. I read in one of the local Tulsa papers that the Hop Jam broke attendance records last year making it the largest craft beer festival in Oklahoma. This year was no different, with just a little over 20,000 people in attendance. I also read in Tulsa World that last year there were 13 brewers in attendance, this year that number increased to 30. 

As VIP’s we were given these cool  lanyards  with shot glasses attached to them that had Hop Jam written on the outside in green and a green trucker style hat to match. I felt like a beer gangster about to ride. The weather was beautiful, but hot and there were tons of people everywhere, yet it didn’t feel crowded as we walking around the streets. The lines moved relatively quick and the brewers made extra effort to keep the beer flowing.

Just after we set out on our beer tasting quest we saw Isaac and Taylor at the Mmmhops booth serving beer, then saw Zac, with his dog in tow, busy mingling in a crowd that surrounded him nearby. After tasting a few beers we made our way to a somewhat long line at the Mmmhops booth. I wish I could have told my former teen self that one day that Isaac Hanson would serve me beer, I’m getting a image of myself bugged eyes and in disbelief. I spotted a friend who was already in line so we jumped in next to her. As we stood in line my mind I was trying to figure out which with beer I wanted to taste the Okie stout or the Framhouse brew and would this be the time to ask Isaac for a picture with him ( my first). When it was my turn to taste the Mmmhops goodness I noticed Taylor had already disappeared from the booth to do whatever Taylor does when he disappears (My theory is he’s found the fountain of youth and he’s hiding it in his office at 3CGS and needed a refresher).

So with my shot glass ready and my iPhone camera on standby we approached the booth. Isaac said hello with a smile and asked which beer I wanted to try, I had no clue so I said ‘you pick’. Isaac looked surprised and made a ‘ I don’t know ‘ expression, then thought for a second and decided to give me the Farmhouse brew, took my shot glass and filled it up. After some brief bantering back and forth, which is still all a bit of a blur, I decided this was the picture moment and went for the ‘Will you take a picture with us ‘ question; the problem is, if you’ve read any of my blogs about my picture experiences with Hanson, you know what came out of my mouth was not what was rehearsed in my mind. So you guessed it - instead of ‘will you take a photo with us? ‘ ‘Would you take a backwards pic with us ‘ came out. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, not only did I instantly regret not practicing that phrase more than just the time spent staying in line, but I single handedly confused Isaac Hanson, life fail moment #345. I attempted to play it off like it was Urban slang with a casual smile like it was the new it phrase and only us cool people like Isaac and myself would get it , but before I could, Isaac said ‘ You mean like a photo?’,  to which I replied ‘ yeah, is that ok?’ Isaac said ‘ of course!’ and I proceeded to hand him my phone that I was holding while telling him ‘ I’ll let you take it, you’re better at this than I am’.  I don’t really know exactly what possessed me to hop my happy butt onto booth table, but I did. I didn’t knock anything over and I didn’t fall off, so I consider that  awkward winning.
My friend Kristie and Isaac and I all leaned in for the picture. Isaac snapped a couple of pictures right in a row and afterwards handed me back my phone, at which point I did contemplate how long I could go without wiping off the Isaac palm sweat off the case. I thanked him and he replied with ‘no problem’ and we started to make our way to the other booths to taste some more of the hoppy goodness. Floating on cloud nine that finally after attending 8 Hanson tours I finally scored a picture with Isaac (and it was in focus too!!)

Speaking of life fail moments, I should probably also mention a brief opps when Taylor and Isaac were doing a TV interview I was at a some what distance behind them carrying on a conversation with some friends. We may or may not have been too loud laughing and may or may not have gotten the ‘ shut up ‘ look from Taylor. Sorry guys for not paying attention to our volume level or the interview

Photo Credit: Janet Kuminski

I tried to take in a much of the event as I could and when it was time for the live music to begin we made our way over to a stage that had been set up for the event. We ended up standing 2nd ish 3rd ish row Taylor’s side right in front of the piano. Once the other bands invited to the event had finished their set, there was energy happening in the crowd that had grown quite large, that began to shift.
This could only mean one thing: Hanson was about to take the stage. As they walked out to a cheering crowd suddenly, the sweltering heat evaporated and two undeniable realities occurred to me in that moment: one, Hanson walking on stage will always make my heart skip a beat and two, how is it possible I end up standing behind a lady in a wheelchair at almost every show? I don’t remember what songs were played or what order they played them in, but I do remember having one of the best times at the concert I’d had in a while.

Verdict: Raise and praise to the power of Hanson .

The Fan Club Dinner A Must Do or A Must Don't?

I honestly purchased the dinner ticket with the intention of grabbing food to go, so I would have something to eat after the concert. So imagine my annoyance when the hostess informed me I would be unable to get anything to go: it felt like I was being forced to stay and mingle. I then was escorted to a table consisting of three other fans I had never met before already seated. Usually I’m all for meeting new people, but Kristie had just sent me a text informing me that the line for the concert was already half way down the block and wondered how much longer I would be. It was official I was stuck in small talk hell.

My dinner companions for the evening were three women - a wheelchair user who wore a Hanson t-shirt and two fans in their mid to late 20’s. We all just sat there staring at each other and I kept my sunglasses on in the hope it would give the waiter the vibe that I was in a hurry. The women in the wheelchair started the conversation off first by sharing with us what Hanson’s music has meant in her life, what a difficult trip it was for her to be able to make because of physical complications, how this was her very first MOE followed by how truly excited and grateful she was to be able to be there. After hearing the excitement in her voice, I took off my sunglasses and decided I needed an attitude change. My mind began to drift back to this moment of clarity I had a few years prior while standing in the BlueBird Theater in Denver, CO. chatting with two women in the crowd before the show. One, who was standing the furthest from me, made small talk asking how long I’ve been a fan , where I was from, how many shows I was going to see this tour ( the usual pit conversation). I told her this was number five of eleven shows I would be attending. Just then the women standing closest to me interrupted my proud show number exclamation story to ask if knew if Hanson would be play Mmmbop? She figured I would know since clearly this wasn’t my first Hanson show. I gave a snarky tone “ Um yeah, they always play it” and rolled my eyes. What she said to me next gave me a giant lump in my throat:  “Oh I hope so!!! This is my very first Hanson concert ever.” It turned out that she was 4 months pregnant with her first child and wasn’t sure if she would be able to attend any more Hanson shows any time soon because her husband had been out of work for quite some time. She went on to say how tonight was a surprise birthday gift from her best friend and pointed at the other women I was chatting with.
I curiously asked her why had she waited so long to attend one, and she briefly told me of a couple of life complications that always seem to prevent her from seeing them play live over the years. She then proceeded to worry that they wouldn’t play the song and how broken hearted she’d be they didn’t play it. It was the only song she wanted to hear that night because it meant so much to her personally. This time I assured her with a much kinder tone that I would cross my fingers that tonight would be her lucky night.
I don’t care how long you have been a member of this fandom, when you meet a fan that shares with you, a total stranger, the love for a song you’ve heard tons of times played live, there is a sense of renewal for a 20 year old song and three blonde guys from Tulsa Oklahoma, followed by feeling like a giant ass for the eye roll.

I snapped out of my daydream to my dessert and salad being placed in front of me at the same time. I wondered if this was like a hipster thing where you eat last course to first instead of the traditional order but when the other at the table received their main course first I realized I was way off. Conversation continued. and by the end I had made three new friends. My only complaints are I would love to see them have a get to know each other card set out on each table next year with a few conversation starters to get the ball rolling and have the option to get our food to go. I will do this activity again next year because the food was even better later that night when we got back to the hotel after the after party. And I made three new friends .

Quick look-

Location: Chaz’s Chowhouse
Food style: Southern home cooking
Cost:  Average entrée is priced at around $10.00  (American)
Fan Club Dinner Price: $22 (included a fountain drink, main dish ,choice of soup or salad and dessert sampler)
Atmosphere: Casual dining with an upstairs area, lots of seating. Loved the exposed brick and strands of lights used as decor.
Restroom: Needs improvement.
Parking: Street parking (or walking distance from anywhere in the Brady arts district)
What I had: Kaushi burger (sometimes you just really want a burger)
How was it? I give my dining experience 3 out of 5 stars
Why only 3 stars? I didn’t receive my drink and silverware till after the main course was on the table. I had to ask quite a few times. Was also served my salad then dessert before main entrée (they were trying to help us get out of there quicker ). Normally this wouldn’t be a big deal, I was just really in the mood for actually food before dessert this time. Also the dessert sampler I would consider more dessert bites rather than a true dessert sampler or even a mini sampler)


Verdict: When in Tulsa the Kaushi burger from Chaz’s Chowhouse is a must do. I’m still not a huge fan of the song Mmmbop, but what I am a fan of is how connected people can feel to the music .